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I guess its my turn


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Geezus Stan...your situation sounds like a carbon copy of mine...except for the dawg.  Mine realized most anything we had was for the taking, but the pooch...that was to the death...lol.

  If I'm not imposing, is your wife between the age of say, 34 to 41 maybe?  Ever since my divorce I been kinda noticing that there's a surprisingly large percentage of gals that suddenly decide they aren't happily married anymore (mine included) that fall into this age group.  Ask around, I've got a point here.

  New age gals will tell you this coincides with reaching their sexual peak, but personally I believe it's more akin to something that acts like "vapor lock".  Everything's goin along fine and then suddenly. out of the blue,  the bitch starts couchin, sputterin..actin like shit.  Some got the patience to work thru it, some got a worse case than others, but that "fuk you, you're the source of all my troubles" attitude is hard to work thru.

  Keep your head up and talk with your friends when you feel the need.  You seem to have a great many of them in here and they apparently hold you in high regard on BHQ.  Good luck mate..if you ever need the advice of a stranger, they don't get much stranger than mine..  :dance:

 

                                ~cork

510019[/snapback]

 

Sorry I don't reply all in one thing, but I'm going on about 36 hours or so without much more than about 3 hours of sleep. Makes it hard to function.

 

She is 28 but its funny you mention "new age"...this friend I keep referring to is a 50 year old hag that can literally make my wife do anything. According to my wife this woman has "the answers"....its almost like some sick master/student relationship. She has even called our house at 2am for my wife to go out in the yard and pray.....

 

They're both into some weird shit that makes Scientology read like a nursery rhyme.

 

Man..I wonder if I'm the fucked up one for staying this long. After reading all of the stuff I've written, it seems like I was having a bit of denial. I can see it all now, but this shit has been here the whole time.

 

What the fuck was I thinkin? :shootself:

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*just read your post* My ex is 27 and had new friends that were feeding all sorts of crap about how lame I was since I wouldn't go out to clubs and such I'm suspecting. Man I know how you feel, I still think now that I must of been in denial also....It seems so clear once your distanced from it, can't fix the past nor do I want to.

 

Stan I don't know you or anything, but when I read that about what her family said I had flashbacks..No shit. They told me damn near the exact same thing! Her dad said that she "royaly fucked up everything". Step mom thinks she must be bipolar or something and needs counseling.

 

My ex got offended also when I changed all the locks and everything. When you stop being nice like you always were(even though they say your an asshole) they get kinda defensive and don't know how to act.

 

You'll blow your top a few more times, trust me. My words to my ex were that all I was doing was damge control and you made your bed now you gotta sleep in it. Stick to your guns mans, I could of got more but you gotta pick and choose your battles. I paid $2000 in attorney fees and I don't owe her a dime. I probably could've got damn near everything with all the shit she pulled but then you got 10-15,000 in fees, yuh know what I mean.

 

I'm pretty damn sure if you got any real life questions that attorney's can't answer for yuh averyone on her will try to help yuh out.

 

Best of luck

 

Geoff

Edited by Geoff
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Cotton (stan), i dont know you because i've only been on this site for a little while now, but man you are getting lots of support. Dont get yourself down man even though its a hard thing to go though no matter how crazy da bitch is. Stay in there and dont let the little things get you down. :cheers: ...i guess this is the HQ at its best :dance:

 

rock on :headbang:

-ross

Edited by quadwanter
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stan, that whole self reflection, why the fuck did i stay in this for so long, thing comes with almost every relationship. im literally too embarassed to talk much about some of my past relationships because once i was out of them i was mortified that i had stuck around for so long. not to mention mortified that i stuck around til i got dumped instead of the other way around. just keep reminding yourself that you always stayed true to yourself and kept being the good man we all know you are. i really am still stunned about it all. youre one of my idols and i cant imagine someone being able to stand in front of you and say 'nope, dont want you anymore' its beyond my comprehension. like i said, some people just dont know how good theyve had it.

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Helping a friend out during hard times is what friends are for.Several of my family members and friends have went through divorces.They moved on.Wasn't easy,but they are getting by.So will you.Hang in there. :clap::dance::D:clap::dance::D:clap::dance::D

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Shitty she took the dog...it sounds like a country song :D

Out here in Canada beer & pot make it all go away, and if your ever up this way I'll treat ya!

I also think you should draft up your own paperwork with your mad ms paint skills, it prolly buy you a little time anyway :lol:

I hope it works out in the end in your favor, you seem to be an alright guy with all the support for you around here!

Take care man! :cheers:

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Stan, get a good cut throat attorney, but only if you have the cash left in the house to support his bill otherwise let her have it, make her refi it and asume the debt giving you half, in california you could get joint custody of the dog, this exact same thing happened to a buddy of mine and he let the dog out of her yard with no collar and then went to the shelter and adopted it there wasnt a fuckin thing the bitch could do, you need to play the game by her rules buddy, and in the future dont get married, you dont have kids, if you do fall in love load the shotgun and swallow the barrel, somewhere in history it was decieded that a pussy was a goldmine and dick was worthless, treat bitches like the self centered, twats that the majority of them are and you'll do just fine, there might be a period where you masterbate frequently, but you'll get passed that and eventually see more butt than a toilet seat, your biz will do better, all will be well just FUCK THAT BITCH......... :cheers:

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Stan, get a good cut throat attorney, but only if you have the cash left in the house to support his bill otherwise let her have it, make her refi it and asume the debt giving you half, in california you could get joint custody of the dog, this exact same thing happened to a buddy of mine and he let the dog out of her yard with no collar and then went to the shelter and adopted it there wasnt a fuckin thing the bitch could do, you need to play the game by her rules buddy, and in the future dont get married, you dont have kids, if you do fall in love load the shotgun and swallow the barrel, somewhere in history it was decieded that a pussy was a goldmine and dick was worthless, treat bitches like the self centered, twats that the majority of them are and you'll do just fine, there might be a period where you masterbate frequently, but you'll get passed that and eventually see more butt than a toilet seat, your biz will do better, all will be well just FUCK THAT BITCH......... :cheers:

510251[/snapback]

I've already told everyone I know that I'm not soured on relationships, but I sure as shit aint gonna get married again. I think my trust is pretty much fucked up in a serious relationship for a while.

 

I understand about what you're saying about the self centered bitches. But better yet, I think I'll avoid a woman that is that self centered. I dont want it all about me, but for fucks sake...SOMETHING should be about me.

 

Ive considered that with the house as well. Just let her have it and she can pay me or sell it, but I don't trust her to make the payments with me if we put it on the market. I think she'd be willing to sink us both if it meant sinking me.

My credit rating is about the best it could ever be, and I have some plans in the works after this shit is over legally, in about 90 days. I can't risk fucking up my credit.....

 

Loco, thanks for the pic. :notworthy: Those are some nice titties. Does Cole know you have that? :lol:

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Wow.... Stan I'm sorry to be reading this, having never been in this position I really don't have any good advise other than to keep your head up, try to think things out with out emotion (if that is possible) use logical thought processes, and remember that everything happens for a reason. Good luck man, drop me a line if I can do anything.

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Well fuck Stan, welcome to tha club heh B)

 

Some damn good advice here and I know you're gonna make it through this and be WAY better off than before, believe me man it's all good from here on out. Remember you've got friends that do give a shit about ya and your Banshee bretheren aren't gonna let you down. You need something just say the word.

 

And yeah you can count on the cunt to be reading your posts, or having them relayed to her, my ex did and may still, just watch your back until all ties are severed.

 

Trust me dude you're gonna learn from this and be a better man because of it. Don't get down just keep in mind that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger; you'll be better able to see the conniving bitches comin' and steer clear (or just fuck their brains out and say buh-bye heh), you'll gain a whole new appreciation for those that DO treat you right too.

 

I know I'm saying shit you already know or has already been said, but sometimes every little bit helps, sometimes just knowing you've got buds that aren't gonna betray you makes a difference, sometimes just hearin' that we think you're a damn good man and shit just happened helps. Take it easy brotha.

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Man..I wonder if I'm the fucked up one for staying this long. After reading all of the stuff I've written, it seems like I was having a bit of denial. I can see it all now, but this shit has been here the whole time.

 

What the fuck was I thinkin? :shootself:

510173[/snapback]

dont ever question urself or the decisions u made. u loved her for who she was, and she obviously couldnt do the same for u. sounds to me, and this is just wat im getting from reading this thread, like she had it pretty good and possibly got a little spoiled. if ur being true that u did all u could to help the relationship, then my thoughts is she started taking advantage of the fact that she could push u around. and honestly, if she was creating that distance b/w u two (the phone calls, movies) then she was trying to either create an exit for herself, or is on another agenda.

watever it is...all u can do from here on out is keep living ur life the way u want. make urself happy. it's ur turn now.

i dont doubt u hurt from the whole experience, but honestly, u'll only grow stronger from the situation. and dont EVER question wat u did...if it was ur fault...cuz it wasnt and isnt. u are u, and u'll find someone who appreciates that!

good luck! :)

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