Just close yer mouth, fatty. Trust me, if you weigh 280, you look 280. You need to quit that fat girl, "I carry my weight well" mentality.
You don't need to eat everything in sight. It's mind over matter.
Stay the hell away from fast food.
Loose weight, or hot chicks won't want to lick your dik.
A dik lick is way better than a cheeseburger.
Don't get married, thats always good for a 30 lb gain.