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Posted

Its 2am, I know you're a pig, but I got a pretty good buzz on...lets go.

 

I am putting you in charge of my penis tonight, please be responsible.

 

"Are you on the rag?" "No" "great! Lets fuck"

 

You know, looking at you right now, in the dim-light of this barroom... I could fuck you.

 

I just spent 25 dollars on these sheep intestine profalactics. They don't prevent std's, but I am just dying to try them out, you wanna live dangerously?

 

What do I have to do to get this penis in your verjiner tonight?

 

"What's your sign?" "Taurus" "wow!, me too, wanna fuck?"

 

Fuck me whore!

 

Yap, yap, yap! is that all you know how to do with that hole in your face?

 

Im new in town and don't know where the hookers stroll, you wanna make fifty bucks?

 

I would like to have kids one day, not with a hag like you, but I'll let you blow me.

 

Let's not fuck with nature. We are here to make babies. So, grab your ankles

 

I have been looking for a five buck a ride mattress backed bitch like you all my life.

 

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I open my zipper up more?

 

Give me your pussy!

 

Hi, I only have herpes.

 

I have been outbreak free for two weeks

 

wanna go halves on a bastard?

 

Lay down!

 

I eat pussy like a woman.

 

Scrub your ass baby cause your getting company

 

 

:rotflmao: seriously though guys, a girl worth having demands respect and should be shown respect. These lines will only get you slapped, and if they got you laid you better run to the clinic. Funny though. :cheers:

Posted

i like these lines :

 

"im practing to be a surgeon ,now let me get up in them gutts,bitch "

"i truely belive in love at first sight and seeing you stand over there all alone i just new it was fate that brought me to come up here and ask you if yo u wanna fuck and be my bitch "

"id buy yo u a drink but im an uemployoed broke loser with a severe drinking problem"

:dance:

Posted

how about "wannna see my porshe collection?"

Posted

This one works every time as long as its done with a chloroform chaser....

 

Excuse me miss? I seem to have lost my puppy.

 

I think he just jumped into the back of that plain white utility van parked across this dimly lit parking lot. Could you help me get him out?

Posted (edited)
This one works every time as long as its done with a chloroform chaser....

 

Excuse me miss? I seem to have lost my puppy.

 

I think he just jumped into the back of that plain white utility van parked across this dimly lit parking lot. Could you help me get him out?

447686[/snapback]

 

 

just mention to a woman of the possiblity of holding a small furry baby mammal will usually get a woman to cup their hands over their mouth and say " oh my gosh ,wheres this cute lil' guy at? i really wanna hold him " ive found that babychimps,raccons, kuwola bears ,and baby seals are generally considered the most sought after by women ;)

Edited by rocketboy
Posted
just  mention  to a woman of the possiblity of holding a  small furry  baby mammal  will usually get a woman to  cup their hands over their mouth and say " oh my gosh ,wheres this cute  lil' guy at? i  really wanna hold  him "  ive found that babychimps,raccons, kuwola bears ,and  baby seals are generally considered the most sought after by women  ;)

448159[/snapback]

 

-I have a baby monkey in my pants.

-I have a racoon in my pants.

-There's a koala bear...in my pants.

-Wanna see my baby seal? It's over in that plain white utility van

parked across this dimly lit parking lot. :huh:

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