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Redneck Joke Contest


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Redneck Prom Night

 

"Hello brother!"

 

"Hey sis."

 

"I gotsa question."

 

"Shoot sis."

 

"Will you go to prom w'me?"

 

"Eww, no, your my sister!", said the brother.

 

"So.", she replied.

 

"Well ok."

 

So they go to the prom and the sister says, "Will you hug me?"

 

The brother says, "Eww, not in front of everyone!"

 

"Please, please, please." says the sis.

 

"Ok."

 

Then, on the way home, the sister asks him to kiss her. He refuses but she persists and he eventually gives in.

 

When they are in the car she asks him, "Will you fuck me right here in this car? It's prom and I wanna get laid!"

 

"God no!", he replies.

 

She persist and he gives in.

 

He's on top of her, fucking his own sister when she says, "Wow! Your alot heavier than Dad."

 

And he says, "Yeah I know, Mom's told me that already!"

 

:rotflmao:

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Redneck Prom Night

 

"Hello brother!"

 

"Hey sis."

 

"I gotsa question."

 

"Shoot sis."

 

"Will you go to prom w'me?"

 

"Eww, no, your my sister!", said the brother.

 

"So.", she replied.

 

"Well ok."

 

So they go to the prom and the sister says, "Will you hug me?"

 

The brother says, "Eww, not in front of everyone!"

 

"Please, please, please." says the sis.

 

"Ok."

 

Then, on the way home, the sister asks him to kiss her. He refuses but she persists and he eventually gives in.

 

When they are in the car she asks him, "Will you fuck me right here in this car? It's prom and I wanna get laid!"

 

"God no!", he replies.

 

She persist and he gives in.

 

He's on top of her, fucking his own sister when she says, "Wow! Your alot heavier than Dad."

 

And he says, "Yeah I know, Mom's told me that already!"

 

:rotflmao:

307994[/snapback]

 

 

:clap::clap: thats wrong!!

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You might be a redneck if...

 

You have 8 cars and still have to bum a ride to work...

 

Your best pick up line is writen on your baseball cap...

 

Your TV gets 512 channels, but you have togo outside to use the bathroom..

 

You've ever dreamthd about tires...

 

aight got people pointin at eachother now... :D

Edited by 03LE
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some more

 

you might be a redneck if..

 

You ever listed fuzzy dice on an insurance claim.

 

You list tick removal as a skill on your resume.

 

Your nicest towels say, "Property of Motel 6".

 

You have lost at least one tooth opening a beer bottle.

 

Jack Daniel's makes your list of "most admired people".

 

You think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are "Gentlemen, start your engines."

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............and more from me.

 

You might be a Redneck if.................

 

You can ruin a pair of shoes in one wearing.

 

Nothing in your refrigerator was purchased at a store.

 

You bum a dip from your mother.

 

You're using the "Twister" mat as the shower curtain.

 

You have ever ordered a bucket of skin from KFC.

 

You have ever watched the Daytona 500 naked.

 

You clean your garage and realize that you did not sell your Banshee.

 

Your favorite adult beverage doubles as gas for your car.

 

You inherited a toilet plunger.

 

You buy stuff at your own yard sale,

 

You have ever had your nipple bitten off by a beaver.

 

You use the bathroom plunger every day.

 

.........and I'll come up with more tomorrow.

 

:flush:

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How many rednecks does it take to eat a possum? Two. One to eat, one to watch out for traffic.

 

What's the difference between a good ol' boy and a redneck?

The good ol' boy raises livestock. The redneck gets emotionally

involved.

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