followme2b2 Posted January 14, 2008 Report Posted January 14, 2008 (edited) Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean. Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down. The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably. If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face. Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls. When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever. The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist. Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear. CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time. There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live. Edited January 14, 2008 by followme2b2 Quote
kodie Posted January 14, 2008 Report Posted January 14, 2008 when chuck norris jumps into a lake chuck norris doesn't get wet, water gets chuck norris. Quote
KaosBanshee44 Posted January 14, 2008 Report Posted January 14, 2008 Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean. :yelrotflmao: That's hilarious Quote
kodie Posted January 14, 2008 Report Posted January 14, 2008 :yelrotflmao: That's hilarious haha ya that one got me laughing pretty hard. Quote
shanYE west Posted January 14, 2008 Report Posted January 14, 2008 (edited) Who would win in a fight? Chuck Norris or God? Trick question.. Chuck Norris is god. Edited January 14, 2008 by Fouledout421 Quote
dogboystoy Posted January 14, 2008 Report Posted January 14, 2008 Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried Quote
black sunshine Posted January 14, 2008 Report Posted January 14, 2008 Chuck Norris doesn't sleep.............He waits.......... Behind Chuck Norris' beard there is no chin.................there is only another fist. Quote
The Rebel Posted January 17, 2008 Report Posted January 17, 2008 Chuck Norris is as tall as , ahh shit, what's that little fuckers name on fantasy Island.......you know, the plane the plane . well any way, he is as tall as the two roundhouse kicks he put on Bruce right before he GOT HIS ASS KICKED !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Quote
dalegoldston Posted January 17, 2008 Report Posted January 17, 2008 You know why you are in the deep south, cause chuck norris allows you to be there. Chuck Norris is as tall as , ahh shit, what's that little fuckers name on fantasy Island.......you know, the plane the plane . well any way, he is as tall as the two roundhouse kicks he put on Bruce right before he GOT HIS ASS KICKED !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Quote
Titan up Posted January 19, 2008 Report Posted January 19, 2008 When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris Chuck Norris secretly sleeps with every woman in the world once a month. They bleed for a week as a result Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now the Islands Death once had a near Chuck Norris experience Rosa Parks refused to get out of her seat, because she was saving it for Chuck Norris Quote
docjcwatson Posted January 23, 2008 Report Posted January 23, 2008 It is a proven fact that John F. Kennedy was not shot at all. Instead, as the three speeding rounds whirled towards his head, Chuck Norris popped up out of nowhere and stopped the rounds with his beard. JFK's head exploded in shear amazement. - Justin Quote
woodro77 Posted January 24, 2008 Report Posted January 24, 2008 chuck norris invented al 32 letters of the alphabet . chuck norris can jump start a car with jumper cables attached to his nipples . there are no such things as tornados , chuck norris just hates trailer parks . Quote
felcon edition banshee Posted February 17, 2008 Report Posted February 17, 2008 (edited) Chuck Norris orderd a BigMac at KFC, and got one if Chuck Norris ever fought himself, he'd win, period If you have 5 dollers and Chuck Norris has 5 dollers, Chuck Norris has more money then u ROFL!!! :yelrotflmao: :yelrotflmao: :yelrotflmao: : Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer. If u dont get it serch: cant touch this Edited February 17, 2008 by felcon edition banshee Quote
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.